Crime & Safety

Spitting in a Cop's Face: What the 'After' Photo Looks Like: OMGPD

Wheelchair thieves, a 13-year-old pot king and a classless Porsche driver nabbed by the Bladder Patrol this week in the annals of Crime-N-Shame.

Just Another Pretty Face: Aside from the assortment of face and neck tattoos, we're not sure what Benjamin Lawton looked like before he walked into Zelmo's Full Moon Saloon in Joliet. But when he refused to leave (we're sure he was asked nicely), police were called to escort him from Zelmo's, whereupon he allegedly spit in a cop's face. His booking mug features a variety of bumps and abrasions.
> Joliet Patch

You'll Get the Chair for This: A pair of thieves stole a motorized wheelchair from the Elmhurst Kmart. They sped off in the getaway chair, and no one could stop them.
> Elmhurst Patch

Sleepy Firestarter: A Minooka man woke up to find himself surrounded by dreamy firemen ... who'd just doused a fire at a Bolingbrook business. Police believe the man set the fire, then went inside for some beer and a nap.
> Bolingbrook Patch

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Eggsacting Revenge: A Glenview house on Monterey Drive was struck with a dozen eggs, damaging just about everything. The homeowner says the damage is permanent. Meanwhile, over on Independence Avenue, a car was pelted with a dozen eggs, too. No word on what might have set off the eggers.
> Glenview Patch

Cheech and Wrong: A 13-year-old boy gave another 13-year-old boy money to buy pot, but instead of returning with a bag of weed, he came back armed with a BB gun and stole the rest of the other kid's money. No, really, we're not making this up. 
> Joliet Patch

Find out what's happening in Tinley Parkwith free, real-time updates from Patch.

Repeat Offender: If at first you don't succeed, try, try, try, try, try, try, and try, try, try again. A guy in a minivan went to the same bank and put paper over the ATM surveillance camera and tried to sneak money out of the machine over and over again.
> Elmhurst Patch

Great Granny: A quick-thinking granny thwarted a grifter's "I'm your grandson and I need bail money" con. Good for her! Do your grandparents a favor and tell them you'll never call them for bail money. Ever.
> Elmhurst Patch

Bladder Patrol: An alert citizen spied a man urinating in an Oak Lawn parking lot before driving away in his Porsche with two pals. The spotter called the cops, followed the Porsche and said he'd press charges. Zero tolerance for reckless bladder release.
> Oak Lawn Patch


And a Dose of Good News! Three dispatchers who helped police find a suicidal woman who dialed 911 and then hung up will receive an award in Glenview. The woman was found lying in the road. 
> Glenview Patch


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