Women Behind the Wheel: Weird Crime 2012

Strange-but-true stories from the Patch files of bizarre and ridiculous antics perpetrated by your fellow south suburbanites the past year.

Auditioning for the Next 'Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle'? A Mokena woman who drifted over the center line, jumped the curb and almost hit a telephone pole just before midnight on Sept. 12, told cops she was driving home from White Castle. She had a half-eaten slider in her hand that she continued to munch on despite the officer's repeated requests to drop the burger. After cops towed her car — and the White Castle burgers still inside — she refused to talk to the cops. She was accused of driving under the influence of painkillers, muscle relaxants and Ritalin. On Mokena Patch

This One Wasn't Craving Sliders: In the So-Not-a-Crave Case department, a Frankfort woman who was pulled over and taken into custody after she almost struck another car on March 16 began acting nervous and suspicious in the police station. After officers told her she couldn't get any alone time in the toilet, she 'fessed up to hiding syringes, a plastic bag and a large spoon in her vagina. Really, what's wrong with carrying a purse? On Frankfort Patch

Wrong Turn into Whackoville: A woman who took a wrong turn onto a dead-end street tried to turn around in Ronald Mathiss's driveway, a move which apparently incensed the 55-year-old Mathiss to such a degree that he ran to her car and smashed it repeatedly with a baseball bat while yelling obscenities. He was charged with aggravated assault and criminal damage to property. On Palos Patch

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